Everyday Holy

I have been feeling so grieved in my heart lately, missing true fellowship and community in the Church.

Hopefully me saying that doesn't make anyone feel bad. I so appreciate and value all the friendships we have, they are each special and a blessing in their own ways.

We had this season in our lives when we were part of a ministry, the birthing of a ministry at that. We spent so much time with an amazing couple and their children, they became family and will always be dear friends close to our hearts. The experiences we shared, the amount of time spent together --- talking, sharing meals, just doing life together as well as having amazing times of worship and prayer in each other's living rooms. It was all this incredibly natural flow of lives synched, hearts intertwined, all for the Glory of One King.

That season of our lives came to an end, although still like family in our hearts and forever friends, we have moved on to different things, and they have even moved across the country...land and sea have become barriers that physically separate us.

It is funny how I look back and reflect and even as I wrote, "we were part of a ministry, birthing a ministry...," I was referring to the actual ministry organization. But now that I have some retrospection going on, I realize the actual ministry was in our relationship, the daily communion, the living room prayers and worship, the midweek phone calls, the late night couch venting, the laughter over meals, the friendships made, the constant encouragement and support...you get the idea.

Two years, well almost two years, is what has passed since my family and I have experienced that type of living Church. And part of that time has really been needed. We needed a season of rest from a lot of busy, doing, going. Now I am so overwhelmed with the need of being part of the functioning Body of Christ again. I have even found myself weeping at night, literally grieving from missing that interaction, that communion.

I recently was having a conversation about being less than satisfied, let's say, with typical group meetings during the week. The formats, layouts, provided videos and questions...it all sort of irritated me. Obviously there is a time and place for that type of stuff, I get it. So in this conversation I was basically asking, "Is it too idealistic of me to think meeting with other people can just be free and develop into whatever it develops into, lead into it's own natural, organic, thing?" For example, when we met with our old friends, we did have an agenda: to seek God, worship Him, pray for our region, and listen to His voice and of course talk, spend time together, enjoy one another. Many times we would just gather and talk about our week or day and we would find something in common, some shared thread that we felt God was weaving and that would turn into deeper conversation, bible pages flipping, prayer starting, and erupting worship. There were also plenty of imperfections and hard moments to push through, but that's life. We're human. It always led to grace, learning and growth. That doesn't sound idealistic to me, that sounds like everyday holy. It sounds like Church. Like what should be.

Ok, so I am not all hung up on what once was over here. I am just reflecting and learning STILL from those experiences I had. I am excited to have them again and in even greater ways. For whoever those experiences will be shared with, and for whomever will be touched by them, I look forward to it all.

And for what it's worth, I think it is time to break out of the cage of old mindsets of how to do church and truly find freedom to be the Church. So we can live everyday holy together.